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Episodes
#270: Aggression Entrapment - How to Work Through Children's Meltdowns
In this episode, Kim John Payne explores a dynamic he calls “aggression entrapment,” where a child’s meltdown becomes a way to secure a parent’s full attention. He explains that frequent meltdowns can signal a child’s...
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#269: The Art of De-escalation - Walking Away vs Stepping Back
In this episode, Kim John Payne explores how parents can navigate escalating situations without making a child feel abandoned. He draws a clear distinction between “walking away” in frustration and “stepping back”...
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#268: Helping Older Siblings Feel Secure When a New Baby Arrives
In this episode, Kim shares thoughtful ways to support an older child when a newborn joins the family. He emphasizes the importance of maintaining closeness through physical touch and preserving familiar family...
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#267: Why Teens Can Seem Distant and How to Stay Connected
Kim John Payne offers a view of adolescence by comparing teenage emotions to an artesian water flow. While younger children often express their feelings outwardly, teenagers tend to turn inward. Their emotional lives...
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#266: Giving Children Time and Space to Wonder
Kim reflects on the beauty and importance of slow learning. He invites parents to protect and nurture a child’s natural tendency to wonder, observe, and inquire. Instead of immediately reaching for quick answers...
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#265: Children's Big Feelings
In this episode, Kim John Payne explores how young children experience emotions as full-body states, rather than isolated feelings they can easily identify and name. He expresses concern about the modern emphasis on...
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#264: Another Way to Understand It
Kim offers a fresh perspective on childhood anger, inviting parents to view it as a natural attempt to restore emotional balance. Anger may surface when a child feels powerless, ignored, or overwhelmed, and while it...
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#263: The Hidden Treasures of Previewing
In this episode, Kim expands on the idea of previewing as a key parenting tool that brings calm and predictability to family life. He describes two types of previews: larger ones that look ahead to the day or week and...
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#262: The Four "Its" of Problem Solving
Kim shares a simple yet powerful approach for when things are heading in a difficult direction with children. The process includes four steps: calm it down, work it out, put it right, and move it on. He emphasizes...
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#261: No. You Do It!
In this episode we hear how to help a child who insists on being helped do things they are perfectly capable of doing themselves, and how to support them in finding ways to problem solve and build greater agency and...
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#260: Bed Time Hostage Taking
In this episode we explore why children cling on to a parent at bedtime and refuse to sleep unless they mom/dad/caregiver is laying next to them. As always we hear about ways to help this tendency that mainly relate...
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#259: Plan B - Helping Tweens & Teens Adjust
In this episode we explore how to help tween and teens develop a plan for when things go wrong and how to adjust in order to keep moving towards their goal.
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